He thought he was some Wall Street wizard, glued to his phone, wasting someone else’s money like it grew on trees. I ran into them at a crappy café — he was bragging, she was bored. While he drowned in fake trades, she and I slipped into the back for a little hands-on action. Skin on skin, soft moans behind thin walls… and the guy? Still crying over crypto, clueless he’d just been shorted in more ways than one.

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